The King of Forwards » Religious

This is what ________ looks like

The King of Funny Forwards — Sat, 05 Dec 2009 14:01:46 +0000

THIS IS WHAT ‘SORRY’ LOOKS LIKE:

This is what tired looks like

This is what bad spelling looks like

This is what intimacy looks like

This is what deaf looks like

More after the break

This is what courage looks like

This is what ‘good grief!!’ looks like

This is also what Thank You Lord that I was not in it looks like!!

This is what your tax dollars look like

This is what McBurnt looks like

This is what ‘I can wait’ looks like

This is what a Grandma looks like

This is what a blonde’s car looks like

This is what cool looks like

This is what a helping hand looks like

This is what cold looks like

This is what an angel looks like

This is what a bad mood looks like

Remembering 9-11

The King of Funny Forwards — Fri, 04 Sep 2009 19:26:46 +0000

WHAT’S WRONG WITH IT?

If you look closely at the picture above, you will note that all the Marines pictured are bowing their heads. That’s because they’re praying. This incident took place at a recent ceremony honoring the birthday of the corps, and it has the ACLU up in arms. ‘These are federal employees,’ says Lucius Traveler, a spokesman for the ACLU , ‘on federal property and on federal time. For them to pray is clearly an establishment of religion, and we must nip this in the bud immediately.’ When asked about the ACLU’s charges, Colonel Jack Fessender, speaking for the Commandant of the Corps said (cleaned up a bit), ‘Screw the ACLU.’ GOD Bless Our Warriors, Send the ACLU to France May God Bless America , One Nation Under GOD! What’s wrong with the picture? ABSOLUTELY NOTHING.

GOD BLESS YOU FOR PASSING IT ON!
I am sorry but I am not breaking this one….Let us pray

Prayer chain for our Military…please don’t break it.

THIS NEEDS TO GO AROUND THE USA MANY TIMES SO KEEP IT GOING.

Meet me in the Stairwell

The King of Funny Forwards — Wed, 02 Sep 2009 19:22:53 +0000

‘MEET ME IN THE STAIRWELL’

You say you will never forget where you were when
you heard the news On September 11, 2001.
Neither will I.

I was on the 110th floor in a smoke filled room
with a man who called his wife to say ‘Good-Bye.’ I
held his fingers steady as he dialed. I gave him the
peace to say, ‘Honey, I am not going to make it, but it
is OK..I am ready to go.’

I was with his wife when he called as she fed
breakfast to their children. I held her up as she
tried to understand his words and as she realized
he wasn’t coming home that night.

I was in the stairwell of the 23rd floor when a
woman cried out to Me for help. ‘I have been
knocking on the door of your heart for 50 years!’ I said.
‘Of course I will show you the way home – only
believe in Me now.’

I was at the base of the building with the Priest
ministering to the injured and devastated souls.
I took him home to tend to his Flock in Heaven. He
heard my voice and answered.

I was on all four of those planes, in every seat,
with every prayer. I was with the crew as they
were overtaken. I was in the very hearts of the
believers there, comforting and assuring them that their
faith has saved them.

I was in Texas , Virginia , California , Michigan , Afghanistan .
I was standing next to you when you heard the terrible news.
Did you sense Me?

I want you to know that I saw every face. I knew
every name – though not all know Me. Some met Me
for the first time on the 86th floor.

Some sought Me with their last breath.
Some couldn’t hear Me calling to them through the
smoke and flames; ‘Come to Me… this way… take
my hand.’ Some chose, for the final time, to ignore Me.
But, I was there.

I did not place you in the Tower that day. You
may not know why, but I do. However, if you were
there in that explosive moment in time, would you have
reached for Me?

Sept. 11, 2001, was not the end of the journey
for you . But someday your journey will end. And I
will be there for you as well. Seek Me now while I may
be found. Then, at any moment, you know you are
‘ready to go.’

I will be in the stairwell of your final moments.

God

During the next 60 seconds, stop whatever you are
doing, and take this opportunity. (Literally it
is only 1 minute.) All you have to do is the
following:

Stop and think and appreciate God’s power
in your life, for doing what you know is pleasing to
Him. If you are not ashamed to do this, follow the
instructions. Jesus said, ‘If you are ashamed of Me, I will be
ashamed of you before My Father’

If you are not ashamed, copy and send this message…only
if you believe ‘Yes, I love my God. He is my
fountain of Life and My Savior. He Keeps me going day and
night. Without Him, I am no one. But with Him, I can do
everything. Christ is my strength.’

THIS NEEDS TO GO AROUND THE USA MANY TIMES SO PLEASE KEEP IT GOING.

The day God spilled the paint

The King of Funny Forwards — Sat, 16 May 2009 06:55:32 +0000

The east side of the Carrizo plain, in the Temblor
Range , about 50 miles due west of Bakersfield ,
California Photo taken by Barbara Mathews
May 14, 2005
Nothing man can do could ever equal the glory of
God’s creations.

Video – Things you miss when you don’t go to church

The King of Funny Forwards — Thu, 14 May 2009 06:40:45 +0000

Video – Why can’t mormons send flowers?

The King of Funny Forwards — Thu, 23 Apr 2009 06:22:14 +0000

99 Balloons

The King of Funny Forwards — Thu, 19 Feb 2009 05:41:29 +0000

This short video is called 99 balloons. This video truly

reveals the truth that God does indeed walk with us

through the storms of life. The family in this video is

inspiring. I will never see balloons the same ever

again.

99 Balloons Video

Family Tree

The King of Funny Forwards — Sat, 14 Feb 2009 05:47:43 +0000

A little girl asked her mother: ‘How did the human race appear?’ The mother answered, ‘God made Adam and Eve; they had children; and so was all mankind made.’ Two days later the girl asked her father the same question. The father answered, ‘Many years ago there were monkeys from which the human race evolved.’ The confused girl returned to her mother and said, ‘Mom, how is it possible that you told me the human race was created by God, and Dad said they developed from monkeys?’The mother answered, ‘Well, Dear, it is very simple. I told you about my side of the family, and your father told you about his.’

Moms

The King of Funny Forwards — Tue, 03 Feb 2009 16:50:03 +0000

Answers given by 2^nd grade school children to the following questions:

Why did God make mothers?

1. She’s the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.

2. Mostly to clean the house.

3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.

How did God make mothers?

1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.

2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.

3.. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts.

What ingredients are mothers made of ?

1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.

2. They had to get their start from men’s bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.

Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom?

1. We’re related.

2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people’s moms like me.

What kind of little girl was your mom?

1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.

2. I don’t know because I wasn’t there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.

3. They say she used to be nice.

What did Mom need to know about dad before she married him?

1. His last name.

2. She had to know his background. Like is he a croo k? Does he get drunk on beer?

3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?

Why did your mom marry your dad?

1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot.

2. She got too old to do anything else with him.

3. My grandma says that Mom didn’t have her thinking cap on.

Who’s the boss at your house?

1. Mom doesn’t want to be boss, but she has to because dad’s such a goof ball.

2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.

3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad..

What’s the difference between moms & dads?

1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.

2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.

3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power ’cause that’s who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend’s.

4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine.

What does your mom do in her spare time?

1. Mothers don’t do spare time.

2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.

What would it take to make your mom perfect?

1. On the inside she’s already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.

2. Diet. You know, her hair. I’d diet, maybe blue.

If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?

1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I’d get rid of that.

2. I’d make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.

3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.

WHEN YOU STOP LAUGHING —

SEND IT ON TO OTHER MOTHERS, GRANDMOTHERS, AUNTS

And anyone else who just needs a good laugh!

Meet Logan the Little Boy with a lot of Faith

The King of Funny Forwards — Wed, 21 Jan 2009 21:26:45 +0000